Mistakes in Crayon, Lucky Number Two, and Other Bradley-isms

It’s always the little things that I want to remember, like the way he looks when he first wakes up, how he eats his cereal, the way he swings his bat, the conversations we have (and just about every little thing about all of my kids). But these little things are the easiest to forget. You might be amused by them at the time. I may tell the funny story to my family or friends, but it fades… and they get older and there are so many things added that I want to remember. So I write them down and take lots of pictures to hang on to what I can.

Here are some of my favorites from the last month:

“Mistakes in Crayon”

As Bradley was getting dressed, out of the blue he says, “It’s okay if you make mis-snakes, I mean mistakes, Mom. Everybody makes mistakes,” he explains to me. “Sometimes I make mistakes in crayon.”

“Yeah. Everybody makes mistakes sometimes,” I agree.

“Yeah,” he says. “I make mis-snakes, I mean mistakes, in crayon at school sometimes, like when I do my ABC’s. Sometimes the teacher lets you start over. Sometimes she don’t. You never know what the teacher will say,” he tells me.

And I am not sure where all of this is coming from or why he’s talking about it now, while he’s deciding which pair of Lego Batman underwear to wear. But I go along with it. “Sometimes I make mistakes, too. But’s it’s important that we learn from our mistakes.”

“Lucky Number 2”

Bradley held up two fingers. “Mom, the number two must be lucky,” he said. “We have two eyes and two ears. We have two arms and two legs. And we have two parts to our butt so we can poop,” he says, laughing like he just figured out a silly secret.

Nice. Leave it to a boy to look at it in that perspective. I had to laugh, too.

“Veins”

Bradley sat at the table examining the blue lines in his hands and wrists.

“Mom, what if one of these vines break?”

“Vines?” I asked, puzzled.

“Yeah, these blue vines.”

I started to pay attention to see what he was talking about. “Oh, you mean veins.”

“Yeah. What do they do?”

“They help put blood through all of your body.”

“Oh,” he said. Obviously not what he expected.

xxx

And if I could understand half of what Collin says, I’m sure I could have a whole book of crazy kid stories. And with Elsie and Mallie coming right up behind Collin, it will definitely be interesting.

I love to hear kid-isms. What are some of yours?

xxx

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The TRUE Story of the Tooth Fairy: Not My Best Parenting Moment

When Bradley woke up and found his tooth fairy money, I could hear his excitement. I heard him jump off his top bunk, I could tell he was smiling just by the sound of his bounce, and he came barging into the bathroom holding his money.

“Mom! She came!” he yelled. “Look at all the money she left me!” he said, holding a wad of ones.

“Wow! How much is there?” I asked, even though I knew. I’m a pretty darn good tooth fairy, if I say so myself.

“Let me count,” he said, going off to his bedroom.

I heard him counting each one very slowly; one, two, three, and so on.

“Five dollars! She left me FIVE dollars!” he said, giggling and doing a little dance. “AND she didn’t put in UNDER my pillow, she put in IN my pillow (meaning in the pillowcase). She’s tricky!”

“Wow! You are such a lucky boy,” I told him.

“Now I have seven dollars,” he said.

Now this wasn’t a problem until he said that he was going to put his money in his wallet, which we keep up high in a special spot so Collin doesn’t get it. He headed downstairs to put his money away and I thought, Oh, shit!  He’s going to find an empty wallet.

See, a few days ago I had “borrowed” a couple of dollars from Bradley’s wallet. We were going to the zoo for a field trip and I didn’t have any cash and no time to run to the ATM. So I took the couple of bucks out of Bradley’s wallet to feed the fish and goats. I was planning on putting it back and just forgot…until now, my “oh, shit!” moment.

I listened to him downstairs climbing onto the counter to get his wallet. I tried to figure out a way of telling him why his wallet was empty. I really hoped that maybe he thought that he had spent his money, but unlikely. I heard his footsteps coming back up the stairs. I was a little surprised at what happened next.

“Mom! The tooth fairy gave me some of my money, too! From my wallet! She IS tricky!” He thought this was great! And I could have been done with it, free and clear.

I could have let him think that the tooth fairy was “tricky” and put his money under his pillow along with what she gave him…but I didn’t. I told him the truth, that mommy took the money for the zoo and that I would give it back to him when I went to the bank. He didnt’ seem to mind.

NOT my best parenting moment…but pretty funny. Hey! I did give him FIVE bucks for that tooth, partly out of the “going rate” for the tooth fairy and partly out of guilt for taking his money in the first place.

xxx